Impressions 12/9/00 Sex_GrandMaster says, today's class is on Impressions vegasvixen listens GEs_sapphire says, listening closely letitia {enters} letitia quietly reenters and takes her seat.. Sex_GrandMaster says, as a submissive and especially an owned submissive, the Impressions you leave on P/people is very important Sex_GrandMaster says, now this is not to say that you should hide your personality or change it to a major degree, as your M/M selected you in the first place for what you are Sex_GrandMaster smiles vegasvixen nods GEs_sapphire says, nodding.....listening.....smiling with pride letitia listens intently.... Sex_GrandMaster says, but as a submissive you should always be aware of what kind of Impression you are making on O/others Sex_GrandMaster says, can anyone tell Me why that is? GEs_sapphire says, raises hand Sex_GrandMaster says, sapphire? GEs_sapphire says, the way we conduct ourselves is a direct reflection of our Masters vegasvixen nods with agreement and raises her hand Sex_GrandMaster says, very good sapphire, the way you act is the way O/others perceive your M/M Sex_GrandMaster says, yes vixen? GEs_sapphire says, beaming smile vegasvixen says, if uncollared it reflects training and future potential to One also letitia smiles at sapphire.. SGMs_annie smiles Sex_GrandMaster says, yes that is true vixen Sex_GrandMaster smiles letitia . o O ( oh future potential...worries ) GEs_sapphire says, raises hand Sex_GrandMaster says, that is of course why I said that you shouldn't try to change your personality traits letitia concentrates..listening..learning Sex_GrandMaster says, yes sapphire? GEs_sapphire says, may i ask a question? Sex_GrandMaster says, you may GEs_sapphire i was recently in a bdsm chat room....one i go to frequently.....i offered to serve a Dom a drink....a known Dom....when He said no....i responded with *politely nods to ..........He the icqd me and was angry....He felt i was demanding to serve...and pouty....can anyone help me understand why He felt this way? vegasvixen . o O ( oh no ) GEs_sapphire says, darn Sex_GrandMaster says, sorry sapphire I should have mentioned there is about a 3 line limit, try again GEs_sapphire says, i was recently in a chat room.....and offered to serve a Domme....that i know well......... Sex_GrandMaster nods GEs_sapphire says, when He said no....i responded with *politely nods to......... GEs_sapphire says, He later icd me....and was angry with me....He felt i was demanding....and pouty.... GEs_sapphire says, i was confused....and not sure why He felt i was demanding to serve Him.... GEs_sapphire says, i thought i was being polite...... Sex_GrandMaster says, well that is indeed an odd response vegasvixen nods Lady_Francesca {enters} ShadowWarrior {enters} Lady_Francesca {leaves} ShadowWarrior {leaves} GEs_sapphire says, i was told the only reason He protected me....was because of who i belonged to...but i truly was surprised by the reaction....as vixen can vouch...i always try to conduct myself in a manner that would make my Mistress proud Sex_GrandMaster says, was there perhaps another sub that He was interested in, in the same room? GEs_sapphire says, no Sir...He entered the room....because an fng was harassing me.....then i offered to serve Him vegasvixen looks incredulous Sex_GrandMaster nods and smiles GEs_sapphire says, He stated to me....in icq....that He would have thought that my Mistress would have trained me better than that.... GEs_sapphire says, i felt as if i had let Her down....but i was confused at the same time Sex_GrandMaster says, Hmmmmmm well I would have considered that good training *S* letitia listens SGMs_annie smiles GEs_sapphire says, thank You Sir....i had to ask.. Sex_GrandMaster says, I think that perhaps this Dom is confused as to what this lifestyle is about Sex_GrandMaster says, on that subject I will comment that Many new Dom/mes think that an offer to serve is an offer of giving more GEs_sapphire says, possibly Sir....*nods* letitia nods Sex_GrandMaster says, or wanting more vegasvixen raises her hand GEs_sapphire says, *turns to vixen* Sex_GrandMaster says, I suggest that you use the term "serve you a beverage" in all cases Sex_GrandMaster smiles Sex_GrandMaster says, yes vixen? vegasvixen says, sweet_lil one is pming me asking me where everyone is vegasvixen says, i don't know how to answer when she isn't in here Sex_GrandMaster says, you may tell her class is in session vixen sweet_lilone {enters} Sex_GrandMaster says, hello lilone, enter and have a seat vegasvixen says, i also had a comment and a question please Sensei Sex_GrandMaster says, sapphire you are aware of the 3 different types of basic serves? GEs_sapphire says, *her eyes widen*......i'm not sure Sir Sex_GrandMaster says, ok after vixens question *S* Sex_GrandMaster says, go ahead vixen GEs_sapphire says, smiles softly vegasvixen says, well my comment was that i would perceive also that this Dom/me was inexperienced in protocol Sex_GrandMaster says, yes I would say that is possible vixen GEs_sapphire says, raises hand Sex_GrandMaster says, sapphire is this Dom relatively new to the lifestyle? GEs_sapphire says, no Sir vegasvixen says, and it relates back to my first comment about conduct reflecting on training ..for example the token courtesy of using Sir/Ma'am Sex_GrandMaster nods Sex_GrandMaster says, go ahead sapphire letitia nods vegasvixen raises her hand GEs_sapphire says, this Dom is a respected friend of my Mistress....one whom i have always served...in the past.... sweet_lilone listens closely seeing this is her first ever class Sex_GrandMaster nods GEs_sapphire says, is it possible.....that because i posted *politely nods*....rather than my usual *warm smile*...that He was offended? Sex_GrandMaster says, I shouldn't think He should be that sensitive sapphire, I would suggest though that you discuss this with your Mistress Sex_GrandMaster says, tell Her how it has bothered you and let Her handle it Sex_GrandMaster smiles Sex_GrandMaster says, vixen? vegasvixen smiles GEs_sapphire says, *smiles*...thank You Sir GEs_sapphire says, *turns to vixen.....listening* vegasvixen says, could You suggest a polite way to tell Dom/mes online that you would prefer to follow your training on protocol ...rather than Their opinion Sex_GrandMaster says, are They insisting that you do what they suggest? vegasvixen says, no Sensei insisting is too strong ..if a comment is made for example vegasvixen says, you don't know that person you shouldn't call him Sir GEs_sapphire says, *smiles.....and understanding smile at vixen* vegasvixen says, how may a girl politely respond ? SGMs_annie raises my hand Sex_GrandMaster says, I would say to Them that your training in the courtesies of the lifestyle is that All are entitled to the simple courtesy of being addressed as a Sir or Ma'am and let it go at that Sex_GrandMaster says, yes annie? vegasvixen smiles and looks to annie SGMs_annie says, maybe in the circumstances of what happened to sapphire it would be best to say: sweet_lilone listens to annie GEs_sapphire says, *listening intently to annie* SGMs_annie says, i am sorry i offended You, Sir/Ma'am, please discuss my behavior with my Dom/me or Protector Sex_GrandMaster nods to annie GEs_sapphire says, *raises hand* Sex_GrandMaster says, yes sapphire? letitia nods @ annie sweet_lilone nods to annie GEs_sapphire says, Sensei Sir i more or less responded in that manner vegasvixen nods SGMs_annie smiles at sapphire Sex_GrandMaster says, and He continued to pursue the matter? GEs_sapphire says, yes Sensei Sex_GrandMaster nods vegasvixen wrinkles up her nose GEs_sapphire says, *places her hand in vixens hand* Sex_GrandMaster says, ok here I will advise all of you that there are good and bad Dom/mes, regardless of how long they have been in the lifestyle letitia . o O ( knows that is true ) GEs_sapphire says, *agrees* vegasvixen squeezes sapphires hand and winks vegasvixen raises her other hand Sex_GrandMaster says, being a good Dom/me requires that You are continually improving your knowledge and control over Yourself, Many do not continue to grow beyond taking the title of Dom/me GEs_sapphire says, *nods*....understood Sir Sex_GrandMaster says, and are so full of Themselves that they think the only correct protocol or way to handle a situation is Theirs vegasvixen puts her hand down Sex_GrandMaster says, I advise you to take "These Dom/mes" with a grain of salt, afford the basic respect and nothing more letitia raises her hand sweet_lilone raises her hand Sex_GrandMaster says, vixen? GEs_sapphire says, thank You Sensei Sir vegasvixen says, Sensei . Your last comment covers what i wished to say Sex_GrandMaster nods vegasvixen says, Thank You Sex_GrandMaster says, letitia? GEs_sapphire says, *listening* says, Sensei Sir when a sub has no M/M it is sometimes hard to know how to behave Sex_GrandMaster smiles Sex_GrandMaster says, first ... Respect is never in error letitia says, well not behave...but how to serve...and it can be soo easy to sort of ummm do something that may offend GEs_sapphire says, *nodding* vegasvixen nods Sex_GrandMaster says, and second be yourself Sex_GrandMaster says, ok I'll cover a bit on serving after I answer lilones question Sex_GrandMaster says, lilone? sweet_lilone says, now say for example you don't belong to Anyone, how does one tell a Dom/me no politely if They are requiring your services more or less ordering you to serve Them and you don't feel comfortable doing so? letitia says, Thank You Sensei Sir sweet_lilone says, but They insist on your doing so? Sex_GrandMaster says, I would say to keep refusing in a polite way, They will make an ass out of their Own self Sex_GrandMaster smiles sweet_lilone says, ok Thank You Sensei Sir vegasvixen raises her hand Sex_GrandMaster says, to begin with you are a submissive not a doormat, and not Everyone's submissive Sex_GrandMaster says, you have a right as a submissive to refuse service to Anyone and to serve those that you choose to letitia . o O ( most definitively not a doormat ) GEs_sapphire says, *listening closely* sweet_lilone says, Thank You, i was just wondering because it happened to me once Sex_GrandMaster says, do you have a Protector lilone? sweet_lilone says, no i don't Sex_GrandMaster says, I suggest that you ask Someone that you trust to be your protector sweet_lilone says, i will Sir and Thank You Sex_GrandMaster {enters} GEs_sapphire says, *listening* vegasvixen smiles to Him Sex_GrandMaster says, did you get the last message? SGMs_annie smiles at You sweet_lilone says, yes Sir i got it letitia says, about a protector Sensei? Sex_GrandMaster says, referring them to your Protector? Sex_GrandMaster nods sweet_lilone nods vegasvixen raises her hand Sex_GrandMaster says, ok it didn't come up on My screen *S* Sex_GrandMaster says, yes vixen? vegasvixen says, may i give llilone a specific phrase ? Sex_GrandMaster says, sure vixen *S* sweet_lilone listens to vixen vegasvixen says, Sir/Ma'am with all due respect this one will politely decline to serve at this time Sex_GrandMaster nods GEs_sapphire says, *nods to vixen*...good one sis letitia nods Sex_GrandMaster says, and just keep posting that lilone sweet_lilone will remember that thank you sis vegasvixen . o O ( with all due respect can mean a lot ) Sex_GrandMaster says, now Does everyone know what a Protector is? vegasvixen nods GEs_sapphire says, *nods*....sort of Sensei sir letitia says, Yes Sensei sweet_lilone says, Yes Sensei SGMs_annie nods Sex_GrandMaster says, ok I'll tell you what a Protector isn't, because sometimes that isn't stressed Sex_GrandMaster smiles GEs_sapphire says, *listening* sweet_lilone listens Sex_GrandMaster says, a Protector isn't Someone that has cyber sex with you, or scenes with you GEs_sapphire says, *nodding.....listening* sweet_lilone raises her hand Sex_GrandMaster {enters} sweet_lilone smiles to Him and raises her hand Sex_GrandMaster says, yes lilone? letitia nods Sex_GrandMaster smiles sweet_lilone says, so basically a Protector is Someone who watched over you to make sure no harm is done right? sweet_lilone says, watches Sex_GrandMaster says, yes and is also there to help guide you when your Dom/me isn't there sweet_lilone nods sweet_lilone says, Thank You Sensei Sir Sex_GrandMaster says, an Advisor and Confidant to help you Sex_GrandMaster smiles sweet_lilone smiles Sex_GrandMaster says, your welcome lilone letitia sounds like a great idea vegasvixen raises her hand Sex_GrandMaster says, you must be very careful in who you choose for a Protector *S* Sex_GrandMaster says, yes vixen? Sex_GrandMaster says, choose even vegasvixen says, there is an article at Castlerealm about Protectors and other definitions Sensei sweet_lilone doesn't know Many Dom/mes in here very well though so it will tough to choose Sex_GrandMaster says, I haven't read it vixen, but Castlerealm is a very good site for info GEs_sapphire says, *turns to lilone....raises hand* sweet_lilone {enters} Sex_GrandMaster says, I don't always agree with definitions on other sites of course Sex_GrandMaster smiles Sex_GrandMaster says, yes sapphire? GEs_sapphire says, although i have been a real time collared submissive for almost two years...i still have had difficulty finding a mentor Sex_GrandMaster nods Sex_GrandMaster says, ok any other questions on this subject? sweet_lilone raises her hand Sex_GrandMaster says, yes lilone? sweet_lilone says, Sensei Sir, i have met Someone in here that has been very nice to me and i feel i can trust Him but i'm not really sure yet, how will i now when it is right to ask Him to be my Protector? Sex_GrandMaster says, just let time take care of it lilone, you will know when you feel the trust needed to ask letitia raises her hand Sex_GrandMaster says, letitia? sweet_lilone nods and smiles, Thank You letitia says, Sensei Sir...a Protector needs to be a Dom/mes Yes? GEs_sapphire says, if i may comment....lilone....be choosy.....i had one once....who simply criticized my Mistress....that is NOT what a mentor should ever do sweet_lilone smiles and nods to sapphire Sex_GrandMaster nods to sapphire GEs_sapphire says, smiles....sits quietly Sex_GrandMaster says, yes letitia, that is how you have Protection letitia says, I thought so Sensei...but just wanted to be certain... Sex_GrandMaster says, a sub is not equipped to call a Dom/me to explain their actions letitia says, thank You Sensei Sex_GrandMaster says, a Mentor or Protector should always support your Dom/me whether they totally agree with what They do or not GEs_sapphire says, *nods to Sensei Sir....relieved* vegasvixen smiles Sex_GrandMaster says, if They have an issue about your Dom/me, it should be taken up with Them, which is also a legitimate course letitia smiles @ her sisters Sex_GrandMaster says, your Protector is charged with your welfare, and that includes talking to your Dom/me about Their behavior if warranted sweet_lilone smiles back GEs_sapphire says, *listening* Sex_GrandMaster says, but They don't talk to you about the issue Sex_GrandMaster smiles GEs_sapphire says, ah!.....*listening* Sex_GrandMaster says, if your collared the Protector should also be agreeable to your Dom/me Sex_GrandMaster says, as there may be times They feel it necessary for your welfare to talk with your Dom/me GEs_sapphire says, Sensei....i welcome that.....Sir Sex_GrandMaster smiles Sex_GrandMaster says, anything else on this? GEs_sapphire says, no Sir sweet_lilone says, no Sensei Sex_GrandMaster looks around letitia says, No Sensei vegasvixen smiles and shakes her head Sex_GrandMaster says, ok back to Impressions for a moment and then I will cover a bit about serving sweet_lilone listens vegasvixen pays close attention GEs_sapphire says, *listening closely* Sex_GrandMaster says, you should always think about what you are about to do or say and the way it will affect the impression of your Dom/me Sex_GrandMaster says, or your loyalty to your Dom/me sweet_lilone has a problem with that Sex_GrandMaster says, you are a reflection of your Dom/mes training at all times letitia likes that concept... GEs_sapphire says, *nods......agreeing* sweet_lilone raises her hand Sex_GrandMaster says, if you flirt overly much it appears that you are looking to play around on your Dom/me, therefore questioning your devotion Sex_GrandMaster says, and of course your morality as well *S* Sex_GrandMaster says, a lot of this can be innocent playing around, but that doesn't alter the Impression Sex_GrandMaster says, yes lilone? sweet_lilone says, Sensei Sir, what if you are a bit stubborn? for example at times i can be a bit thickheaded GEs_sapphire says, *listening.....turns to listen to lilone* Sex_GrandMaster chuckles Sex_GrandMaster says, are you rude about it? sweet_lilone says, no Sir at least i don't think i am GEs_sapphire says, *raises hand* letitia raises her hand.. Sex_GrandMaster says, bye stubborn do you mean "voicing your opinion"? sweet_lilone says, Yes Sir, i have a bit of a problem doing that which sometimes gets my butt into trouble Sex_GrandMaster says, do you push it into an argument? Sex_GrandMaster notes the raised hands GEs_sapphire says, *lowers her hand.....listening quietly* sweet_lilone says, sometimes Sir, that's another problem, i went to school and took some law classes therefore if i don't agree with something i debate the issue Sex_GrandMaster says, nods sweet_lilone says, i know i shouldn't but sometimes i can't help it Sex_GrandMaster says, do you keep it respectful? sweet_lilone says, oh yes Sir Sex_GrandMaster says, ok there is nothing wrong with a submissive having an opinion and voicing it, as a matter of fact I wouldn't want a sub without an opinion sweet_lilone says, i've been like that most of my life Sir, i sort of like to have the last word, especially when i'm right about something vegasvixen raises her hand Sex_GrandMaster says, however I want it voiced respectfully, and I don't want A/anyone to argue with Me to alter My opinions, a debate over opinions is fine *S* sweet_lilone says, Sensei Sir, i have found that Most Dom/mes don't like a sub who challenges Their domination Sex_GrandMaster says, Hmmmmmmmm right in your opinion lilone, GEs_sapphire says, *giggles quietly to herself* Sex_GrandMaster says, and you always do have the last word GEs_sapphire says, yes Sir....the last two words....hehe Sex_GrandMaster says, is that really challenging Their domination lilone? letitia says, Sensei Sir... how does an uncollared sub know if he/she is being promiscuous? Sex_GrandMaster nods to sapphire and smiles GEs_sapphire says, *chuckles* letitia says, oops Sorry Sensei?? hit the wrong button sweet_lilone says, i'm not sure Sir, is it? vegasvixen also knows the perfect last words for a sub sweet_lilone listens to vixen GEs_sapphire says, *squeezes vixens hand* letitia listens to vixen Sex_GrandMaster says, if you are challenging something they have instructed you to do yes it is lilone vegasvixen blushes and waits for permission Sex_GrandMaster says, right or wrong in your opinion if the Dom/me says do it this way that is how it is done sweet_lilone says, yes i know that is Sir, but sometimes it's the manner They have instructed you to do it in GEs_sapphire says, agrees with Sensei Sex_GrandMaster says, I see many "wrong" ways in My opinion but I don't interfere as it is Their right to have it done that way sweet_lilone nods and erases her last comment Sex_GrandMaster says, ahhh well now manner of giving the instructions is a totally different ballgame and subject for a Dom/me discussion LOL SGMs_annie smiles sweet_lilone smiles Sex_GrandMaster says, sapphire? GEs_sapphire says, yes Sensei Sir? Sex_GrandMaster says, I do disagree with a sub correcting the manner in which instructions are given though lilone, that is out of your place Sex_GrandMaster says, you had a question earlier? GEs_sapphire says, *faces Sensei*....it was just a comment Sir....in regards to impressions..... Sex_GrandMaster listens sweet_lilone says, if i may comment.....Sensei Sir....then i should just do it no questions asked correct? GEs_sapphire says, i was going to add....that nothing pleases me more....than to see the expression of pride on my Mistresses face....when Ma'am is pleased...like when another Dom goes to Her...and speaks of my conduct Sex_GrandMaster nods to sapphire and smiles vegasvixen raises her hand Sex_GrandMaster says, letitia and then you vixen *S* letitia says, Sensei...Sir...you mentioned earlier about promiscuity ..for collard subs...well how can an uncollared sub know if he/she is being promiscuous Sex_GrandMaster says, lilone the answer is yes to that question especially if it is poor training on the Dom/mes part, if you begin to correct them the bad impression is left on your doorstep not theirs sweet_lilone says, nods to You Sex_GrandMaster smiles to lilone GEs_sapphire says, *raises hand* Sex_GrandMaster says, if you want to discuss this further I'll be happy to after class sweet_lilone says, ok Sensei Sir Sex_GrandMaster says, letitia, if you begin to get a reputation as a slut to A/all that is being too promiscuous Sex_GrandMaster says, play is fine but it should be discretionary letitia Sir how does a subbie know if they are a slut to all?? oh dear that is showing my naiveté ...sorry Sex_GrandMaster says, a future Dom/me will be judging your morality by your actions as well as your submissiveness letitia ponders her morality... Sex_GrandMaster says, well let's put this in a vanilla setting then letitia listens Sex_GrandMaster says, if you went into the local bar and were continually picked up for the night by the first guy around or a different guy every night that would mark you as a slut or promiscuous right? letitia says, yes Sensei sweet_lilone agrees with that Sex_GrandMaster says, well the same thing applies here or any BDSM site, including RL letitia smiles Sex_GrandMaster says, if you use discretion in your choices you are fine Sex_GrandMaster smiles letitia i understand that...thank You Sensei Sir.. Sex_GrandMaster says, vixen? letitia smiles Sex_GrandMaster says, you're after vixen sapphire letitia says, excuse me Sensei vegasvixen says, may i tell lilone and letitia how the sub always has the last words? Sex_GrandMaster says, yes letitia? Sex_GrandMaster says, yes vixen please disclose the secret LOL GEs_sapphire says, excuse me for interrupting....but i must leave to pick up my Mistress....i want to thank You for making my first class so enjoyable....and feeling so welcomes....*smiles warmly to Sensei...then to the room* letitia says, may i be excused after vixen shares Sir please vegasvixen says, yes Sir/Ma'am letitia lol at vixen good one sis SGMs_annie grins vegasvixen didn't make it up Sex_GrandMaster says, your welcome sapphire and I'm glad you enjoyed it, hopefully it was educational letitia wise and sensible words sweet_lilone {leaves} vegasvixen says, its true GEs_sapphire says, yes.....very Sir....i would like to attend more.... vegasvixen hugs sapphire tight GEs_sapphire says, *waits for permission to leave....hugs vixen tight* Sex_GrandMaster says, i will look forward to your attendance sapphire, be well and safe GEs_sapphire says, thank You Sir sweet_lilone {enters} Sex_GrandMaster says, you may leave *S* GEs_sapphire says, *nods politely.....and leaves* Sex_GrandMaster says, yes those are the final words that a sub always has vixen vegasvixen smiles Sex_GrandMaster says, letitia, you wished to be dismissed also? GEs_sapphire {leaves} letitia says, yes Sir ..smiles sweet_lilone turns to vixen...what were those words i missed them letitia hugs lilone, vixen and annie.. Sex_GrandMaster says, you may and be well letitia letitia hugs SGM Sex_GrandMaster hugs letitia vegasvixen hugs letitia sweet_lilone hugs letitia SGMs_annie hugs you letitia be Well Sensei Sir. and thank You Sir...it has been most interesting.. letitia says, be well everyone sweet_lilone says, be well letitia and take care sweet_lilone nods to vixen letitia {leaves} Sex_GrandMaster says, ok class is formally dismissed, you may stay if you want to talk more Sex_GrandMaster smiles vegasvixen says, Thank You Sensei sweet_lilone says, Thank You Sensei vegasvixen hugs annie SGMs_annie says, thank You Master SGMs_annie hugs vixen vegasvixen hugs lilone sweet_lilone hugs vixen vegasvixen kisses SGM on the cheek vegasvixen says, bye for now A/all SGMs_annie says, be well vixen Sex_GrandMaster says, be well vixen sweet_lilone says, bye vixen, take care vegasvixen {leaves} sweet_lilone says, may this one return to the Hall please SGMs_annie says, ;smiles at lilone Sex_GrandMaster says, yes lilone and feel free to talk to Me anytime, I am always happy to help sweet_lilone smiles at you Sex_GrandMaster says, be well lilone sweet_lilone says, Thank You Sir and i will Sex_GrandMaster smiles sweet_lilone says, both of Y/you take care Sex_GrandMaster says, thanks lilone *S* sweet_lilone gives Y/you a hug and scoots off to the Hall Sex_GrandMaster hugs back