Slavehood
| In any D/s relationship there is no
right or wrong. What may be acceptable to Y/you may not be to S/someone
else. It is the tolerance of O/other's beliefs that creates diversity.
The type of relationship cultivated depends on the P/people and the level
of commitment.
I started my journey as a submissive. I
thought that to be a slave you were interested in the gorean lifestyle.
The gorean lifestyle has much beauty and symbolism, but it is not what
i sought.
The other type of slave to me was the one history
portrays. The classic slave, one owned without a choice. Owned
without free will. Owned in an abusive situation. Owned without
love.
When Sex_GrandMaster asked me to be His, i became
His submissive. As time progressed and the trust between U/us grew,
i began to feel differently. The trust between U/us is the most important
part of O/our relationship. It is the foundation of O/our love.
It didn't happen overnight, it took months for it to reach the level when
i began to feel differently.
As a submissive, i retained a portion of myself.
That portion was in a way a safety blanket. It was the part of me that
held my dreams, insecurities and fears. A place i never shared.
I never trusted A/anyone enough to allow them to get that close to me.
I know without a doubt that my Master cherishes
my gift of submission. He understands the value of giving completely.
He nourishes me. My best interests are of utmost importance to Him.
He loves me unselfishly. Many say these words as collaring vows.
Some do not take them literally. I am blessed with a Master that
does.
The part i was withholding was a shield between
my Master and me. Others have described it as a veil. As i
grew to trust Him, i found that i didn't need to keep that part of me from
my Master. I wanted to give Him all of me.
I made a choice. I exercised my free will.
I chose to devote my life to Him. I was holding back from my Master,
when He held nothing back from me.
Webster defines a slave as a person held legally
in bondage. When my Master and i exchanged O/our vows we created
a bond. W/we exchanged an oath. I freely gave my submission
to Him. He freely accepted it. It was then that W/we created
His ownership of me.
Webster further describes slavery as to toil unremittingly.
It is a labor of love. The fulfillment i receive from pleasing my
Master is immense. The joy i feel is incessant. The confidence
i have in myself is now greater than in any other time in my life.
I became my Master's slave, NOT because He willed
it. I became His slave when i lifted the veil. I became His
slave when i no longer felt insecure or fear. I never feared my Master...it
was me i feared. Many of our fears are unfounded. They are
just there. My fear was from the baggage of my previous failed relationships.
I was afraid that i could not please Him.
When i felt secure in O/our love, i voiced my
fears. Hearing them out loud made me realize that they had nothing
to do with U/us. He loves me for me; for who i am; for what i bring
to O/our relationship. I am not compared to His past relationships.
It was unfair to compare Him to mine.
I lifted the veil and there is nothing between
U/us now. Nothing holding me from Him. It was a choice i made.
He did not ask me to become His slave. It was not a requirement of
His love. I chose to become His slave, to devote my life to Him.
He chose to accept me as His slave.
I serve Him to the best of my ability.
I am growing and exploring myself with His guidance. I have opinions
and i am free to express them. W/we respect each O/thers limits.
W/we practice a safe, sane, consensual D/s relationship. I have safe
words and i use them. If i do not use O/our safe words when needed
it would break O/our trust.
I see slavehood as a vocation. It is a divine
calling. A sacred trust between U/us. It is not for everyone.
P/people think of slavehood as confining relationship. In O/our relationship
it is not. It is His love that set me free.
SGM's_annie copyright 2001 |